Friday, March 30, 2007

Stop Building Your Six-Year-Old's Vocabulary

When we returned home from our vacation I had a nice surprise waiting on our doorstep- a package of goodies from my mother-in-law. It was filled with some very pretty pillows, some cute note cards, odds and ends of newspaper articles and recipes and my new, very serious, literary interest-

Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like A Skank And Other Words of Delicate Southern Wisdom by Celia Rivenbark.

My mother-in-law isn't trying to correct my parenting. She thought I would enjoy the irreverent southern humor of Rivenbark. (There are a few "words" scattered throughout. It's a shame, too. It could have been equally funny without them.)

The book is pink with a little girl on the cover blow drying her hair into oblivion. So it stands to reason that my own little 6 year old would ask me, "Mommy, what's a skank?"

To which I reply,"Someone who dresses trashy."

"What's trashy? Tacky?"

"No. Someone who isn't modest."


"And skank isn't really a word you should be using."

Maybe the next book by Rivenbark will be "Stop Reading Books With Vocabulary On the Cover That Could Make Your Six-Year-Old Sound Like A Skank" or something like that.

Thanks, to my mother-in-law, in all seriousness, if that is possible at this point. It is a funny read- one that I will be tucking in the bedside table. (BTW- she did tell me there were a few words here and there inside the cover that my daughter may not need to see, but I didn't even think that she would be so quick to read the cover. Shows how smart I am.)

And Nanc- guess what I will be passing on to you? I'll send it in a brown, unmarked envelope.



Heather said...

It's like that song by Randy Travis- Three Wooden Crosses. Ever heard it?
Out of the whole song, my 11 year-old niece picks out "hooker" and asks what that is... I sent her to her Mom because that's what I would want someone to do if it had been my child.:o)

Susanne said...

Too funny! I may have to look that book up. And you're six year old read that title? Wow.

ForUsThreeGirls said...

Oh M....I have her book "We're Just Like You, Only Prettier" and it's hilarious!!!!

Love her!!!!

Aunt Boo said...

I went and looked her up too. How funny. Her website has some funny stories on it, especially the one about the snake. Go and check it out if you can.

So Funny!

Betty said...

My curiosity is really piqued...I'll look her up...

Have a great weekend....

Mommy Dearest said...

My 10-year-old came back from a friend's birthday party/shopping trip last night and she'd bought all black jewelry at Claire's. I gave her the whole talk about how I didn't wear black until after I was married and had my first child (true!) and I wound up making the poor child cry. {sigh}

Motherhood isn't for cowards. The book sounds like a hoot!

Linda said...

I hid all kinds of stuff from my girl when she was little because she could read way beyond her years. I felt like a censor, but it was my job. This was so funny. From reading the other comments, sounds like author might be my kind of tea.

Anonymous said...

Do you know I am actually reading that same book right now?? She has quite a few, I have like 3 of them checked out right now!

Nancy said...

I can't wait. I'm sure it is a riot. My mom just told me that she watched Little Miss Sunshine and thought it was terrible. I smiled and said, "I liked it." Obviously, it was tragic and skank-y, but quite oddball, which I like.