Wednesday, June 21, 2006

I'll have the bologna plate special, please.

Last night I made bologna cup.


Well, almost.

It was late and I realized I had not eaten dinner. The rest of my family had been fed. Frequent scenario for most moms and wives. I had some leftover mashed potatoes from the night before, a fresh unopened package of beef bologna (pronounced baloney!). So, what else could I make?

Ba-lon-y cup!!

First let me explain why I actually have bologna in my frig. My child loves fried bologna sandwiches. If you have never had one, shame on you! Your arteries just don't know what they're missing. Before I share the bologna cup recipe, I just must, absolutely must tell you how to make the most perfect fried bologna sandwich.

I am beginning to think I am some sort of bologna chef, sort of like a sushi chef. Only the food is way more processed and less nutritious. Oh, and it doesn't smell like dead fish.

Anyhoo! To make a fried bologna sandwich, you brown a piece of bologna in a pan the way you would fry bacon. Flip it over to the other side. Slather your white bread (let's go for it!) with mayonnaise or yellow mustard. I am from a mayonnaise family. We eat mayonnaise on every sandwich, even a hot dog. (I know that doesn't qualify as a sandwich, but meat and bread are involved.) After you have slathered your bread with one of the two condiments, you place your fried bologna on and enjoy. You can add a fresh slice of tomato or some crisp iceberg lettuce, too. I prefer just mayo and the meat.

So, back to the bologna plate. I placed my piece of bologna in the pan to fry it. Then I waited. See, it is supposed to curl up. When it curls up, it forms sort of a little bologna bowl, or "cup". Clever how I work the name of the dish in there, huh? Never pierce the bologna with a fork or you will make it flat! One must use a spatula. (See I really am a bologna chef.) Well, I waited, I flipped, and I waited. It never curled up. I even used Bryan with the red rind.

See my mother and I had a long heart to heart about bologna recently. I called her one day and told her my bologna problems. "Mama, it never curls up." She informed me the bologna I was buying was too thin. It couldn't curl. You have to buy the thick slices, the ones with the red stuff you peel off. So, I bought Bryan.

Still, no curling. I gave up. At least it was cooked. So I continued with the next step: Place one scoop of mashed potatoes on top of your bologna cup/plate. I was supposed to then top it with a slice of Kraft American cheese, but we were out of cheese!

Oh, my bologna dilemma!

So, instead I had bologna plate, hold the cheese. Yum. And the taste took me back to public school lunch when bologna cup was a treat. It was always curled up just right with melted American cheese on top.

I don't think they fry bologna up North. Bologna is classified as a cold cut from the deli.

But, this ain't New York.


Steph said...

Well, I knew one day you would have one of these blog sites. Some people are just meant for it. For the bologna process - you must also include two other steps in the preparation. First, when you have peeled off the red rind from the thick slices a true Southern boy can remove any small remnant pieces of the bologna that stuck to the rind by pulling the rind through his teeth. Let no pieces parts go uneaten. (Husband is true Southern boy.) Secondly, if you failed to form the cup and have a flat fried piece you can save the day by having a family contest. Have everyone place their flat bologna on individual slices of bread and flip them quickly in half to see whose bologna sandwich pops louder. It is great to be from the South!

Nancy Murphree Davis said...

Well, what can I say....I've never had a bologna cup. Maybe it is because my school didn't have a cafeteria. Mom did send me bologna sandwiches with mayonnaise in my lunch bag. As a kid I hated mayonnaise, but she always put it on anyway, because she loves it. I gave my lunches away to a boy named Henry and ate crackers from the vending machine.
BTW, I wasn't aware they still made the bologna with the red rind around it. I do remember putting it in my mouth after pulling it off!

One of Charlie's Angels said...

Bologna Cups were the best school lunch!!! I haven't had one in ages, mainly because my kids are just starting to eat "mixed" foods!! (You know - food that touches another food)