Saturday, June 14, 2008

I could use a nice Yeti.

We flew to Charleston. On a plane and everything. I've flown before, but it has been a while. I'd forgotten how much I don't like it.

Hubs travels with work and he complains about the flying part. He doesn't mind going somewhere; he just doesn't like getting there.

Hey, Hubs. Me, too.

The last time he traveled, he was seated next to an elderly woman who needed assistance with her seat belt. Bless her heart. This time he was seated smack dab in the middle of daughter and me. We just needed assistance with snack. Hubs travels with a backpack as his carry on and it can come in handy when your daughter wants to watch a DVD or your wife starts to feel a little queasy and needs some salty pretzels to settle her stomach.

That Hubs can be quite useful when he puts his mind to it.

The trip to Charleston was somewhat uneventful, aside from the glitch where the airline seated us in completely separate rows with a minor and the few moments when I wanted to hurl. Besides those two, you know, minor details, the trip was great.

The trip back home was different altogether. In a word- HYSTERICAL.

It may have been that we were all very tired or it may have been that we were suffering from baby toes withdrawal, but something about the trip home was funny. Every single thing that happened was funny.

The people on the plane. Funny.

Del Griffith was seated behind me and he kept kicking my seat. He talked incessantly and I am guessing he was trying to sell shower curtain rings to the guy sitting next to him. Neal Page, I feel your pain.

Del's less friendly cousin was across the aisle from me. (I love an aisle seat. Lots of room. Just protect your funny bone from the beverage cart.) Del's cousin was, ahem, big boned. Just as he was about to get in his seat, he leaned over to put his carry-on under the seat and I just happened to turn my head. It was a full moon right there at 10,000 feet.

Hubs and I could not hold it in. We laughed like school kids. He was laughing at me, not with me.
Fortunately, I don't think Del's cousin caught on to our humor. He was too busy fiddling with his seat belt.

During the flight, daughter fell asleep. Hubs and I dove right in to the crossword puzzle, and then on to the finest shopping in the air.

SkyMall magazine.

I have to ask y'all something. Have any of you ever ordered anything from SkyMall? If you have, please let me know in the comments.

I just don't get it. What is so appealing about shopping on an airplane? Is it boredom or that you don't have to find a parking place? Some of the items are hilarious.

Like the Yeti garden statue. You can impress your friends, offend your neighbors or just freak people out with this Big Foot statue. Can't you just picture it scaring away the plastic flamingos?

There was this patch of fake grass for your puppy to relieve himself. I have that. It's called a rug.

The flight was long enough that we looked through the entire catalog. We laughed until we cried.

I bet Del could sell a few of his shower curtain rings if he just listed them in SkyMall magazine.

Hey, Del. Watch out for Sasquatch.


Amy B said...

I have never purchased anything from SkyMall but have looked at the catalog enough to know I couldn't afford any of the nonsense. I mean, who needs a pop up hot dog cooker for over $50? OH but I would love to have one of those slankets for when I am snuggled up and reading. I don't want to pay that much for it though! :o)

Roxanne said...

What I found hilarious were the prices they were asking. . .oh. my. word. Your story was great--and I'm glad you found it all funny, 'cause it sounded like you needed a laugh.

Tracye said...

You're freaking hilarious. Seems you and I were on a plane near the same time... not place, tho. We went from Houston to D.C. and back.

I haven't read you for a while... boy have I missed out!