Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Y'all give new meaning to Southern Comfort.


If I weren't southern and wordy and long-winded, writing run-on sentences and such, I'd say that your comments about alcoholic sore throat remedies left me speechless. Instead, they had me laughing so hard that I wound up in a coughing fit.

It was very attractive.

I went to dinner last night where I met a few new friends and spent time with old ones. Just before I left, Hubs asked, "How are you going to talk?"

I told him,"I'll figure it out."

Challenging a woman to find a new way to talk is like asking MacGyver to build something out of used toilet paper rolls and crazy glue. One minute everything is quiet and the next, the A-Bomb is going off.

When we arrived at the restaurant I explained that I had lost my voice because of my allergies and that I was not contagious. That last phrase should really be made into a button because I've repeated it at least 100 times in the last few days.


Maybe I should edit it a bit. That's a lot for a button, even for those really big ones we wore on our acid-washed denim jackets in the '80's.

Seriously. The Swine Flu is the new plague.

"People treat me like I have the plague" has been replaced with "people run away screaming like I have the swine flu."

The Swine Flu is really freaking us out. Rightly so. People are becoming very ill.

We're scared to sit too close to someone in church. We're scared to shake hands. We're scared to go to Wal-mart. (Okay, we were always scared to go to Wal-mart.)

The up side (???) is that it gives some folks an excuse to drink whiskey.



Ranelle said...

I liked your MacGyver comparison, but he would've used duct tape, not crazy glue.

Carpool Queen said...

We southerners are not without our rationalizations...especially when it comes to swiggin' whisky in the Bible Belt.

For medicinal purposes, of course.

And even with the pig flu, I don't miss an opportunity to go out with the girls.....

Melanie @ This Ain't New York said...

You are so right, Ranelle.

Susanne said...

Now you must know, I never ever swallowed that ole whisky, right? Right?! ;v)