Monday, March 09, 2009

Marshmallow Chic

I love drug store make-up. Always have. Well, at least since I was about 13 years old and actually allowed to wear it. First came the lip gloss, then a little blush, then a little eye make-up, and lastly foundation. And by a little eye make-up, let me remind you that I was a teen in the 80's, so technically a little was a lot.

But enough about Bonne Bell.

I was at Walgreen's yesterday checking out the Sunday circular. Lipsticks. Buy one, get one half off. You can't beat that. I bought some lovely shades of pinks and corals with names like "Born With It" and "Rose Hush."

Lipsticks always have clever names. The idea is for you to think that you will actually look like Angelina if you wear it. You're all excited when you buy it. Then you get home, put it on and realize that the new color either washes you out or makes your teeth look yellow, which forces you to run back to the store and get whitening strips and tan in a can.

It's a vicious, cosmetic conspiracy.

After I filled my little basket with falsely advertised goodies, I strolled through the Easter aisle. I've got to get a move on. Easter is over a month away. The aisle was filled with the usuals. Marshmallow chicks, hollow chocolate bunnies (the ghetto chocolate bunny), plastic grass, and those disgusting candy dispensers that mimic an animal laying a egg.

In the middle of the aisle was a display of a new kind of Easter treat- boxes of prunes. I don't know about you, but if the Easter Bunny had brought me prunes in my basket, I would have cried.

Please, people. Don't put prunes in your child's Easter basket. I don't care how healthy you are trying to be. Just add some nice granola to the jelly beans.

Besides, giving your child an entire box of prunes with the ghetto chocolate bunny is a risk you don't want to take. That's an accident just waiting to happen. There's no porta potty at the egg hunt.

On a different and much less disturbing note, I think the cosmetic companies should visit the Easter aisle to name some of their lipsticks. There are so many interesting and fun items in all the shades of Spring.

But, "Paradise Prune" isn't one of them.


Susanne said...

Seriously? Prunes? Now that is taking the healthy craze to a whole new level of crazy. LOL.

Shannon said...

"Ghetto bunny." *snort* Best laugh I've had all day.

TRS said...

"mimic an animal laying a egg"

That's a better description than what it really looks like!

stacywhite said...

Aw man and I thought the boys would love those prunes! Ghetto bunny crackes me up. Great blog!

fuzzytop said...

Very funny post Melanie! "ghetto bunnies" that's a keeper!

And what person in their right mind would have pitched the idea at some company somwhere to launch a line of "Easter prunes", and why on earth did that sorry idea NOT die right then and there? I mean really, that's just awful....


2nd Cup of Coffee said...

"the ghetto chocolate bunny" ??? Who thinks up stuff like that?! You are so funny.