Thursday, July 10, 2008

Thursday Thirteen: Summer Epiphanies

1. How in the world did my grandmother do all of her housework, cook three hot meals a day and manage to keep her hair looking good in this heat?

Granny, I am forever grateful for the dishes you left me, and for the advice about locking my doors and how to act like a lady, but a summer survival guide would've been equally helpful.

2. My air conditioning is on and I am sweating.

3. All I did was dust and clean the bathrooms.

4. I actually paused to wipe my brow. Do people still say that? "Wipe your brow?"

5. I went to an elementary school without air conditioning. It was hot. Our junior high and high schools had AC but it never worked.

See, people. Drugs did not fry our brains. The heat did.

6. If it were not for the fact that the pond out back is totally gross and filled with bacteria, rain run-off, and beaver excrement, and for the fact that I have, you know, standards, I would be out there wading in it.

Not swimming. No. That would be totally redneck.


7. I would give a Paula Deen cookbook to just hang out with the polar bears right now.

8. Has anyone noticed that the new buzz word is "climate change?" They can't decide if we are slowing cooking or freezing to death. But, the weather, it is changing.

Thanks, Einstein.

9. I don't think I can get to 13. My brain is cooked.

10. That pond is looking pretty inviting...


Tari said...

This is the time of year when, if I don't get out of Texas for a few days, by September I'm raving "I want to move to Minnesota, North Dakota, Canada!" This heat makes you crazy, I agree.

PJ said...

Yeah. I keep asking what's happening to Global warming...then suddenly we have some hot, hot days. But then, we've alway had hot, hot days.

happygeek said...

Tari, Canada is only inviting for about 6 weeks.
Trust me.
It's July and I am wearing a sweater. We don't have AC. There really is no need.
Trust it cools down for you soonest!