Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Wal-Mart has gone soft.

Daughter and I were running errands today, getting ready for a Big Brownie Sleepover, meaning a sleepover with lots of Brownie Girl Scouts, not a sleepover with really big brownies.

We are going to paint t-shirts, so I had to find a lot of shirts of the same color yellow and of several sizes, all at a low, low price. I went to AC Moore and found all but three of what I need.

We headed to Michael's where we found another shade of yellow which was really a gold and to most people that doesn't matter, but to a Brownie Girl Scout, it totally matters because "Hers is brighter than mine!" and "I wanted that color...why didn't I get that color?"

Add a little whine and disappointment and you've got DRAMA.

I could do without the drama, so I didn't buy the golden yellow t-shirts and decided to stop by Wal-Mart on the way home from church.

Let me tell y'all. I am the expert in Cheap T-shirt Making. It is for me what Impressionism was to Van Gogh, only I didn't cut off my ear.

I have helped design and iron on many a VBS logo. I have purchased nearly every color in the Hanes t-shirt rainbow and I know where you can buy scoop neck, and even the coveted v-neck. So when I got to Wal-Mart I had my game on.

First, I looked in the girls' department hoping that there may be a plain yellow shirt. All I found were tight t-shirts with glittery messages like "Glamour Girl" and "I can do things better than a stinky boy" or something like that. (I hate those "girls are better" messages, by the way.)

Then I headed for the boys' department. That's when I found them. Pastel pink t-shirts right next to the deep blues and reds that you would expect. At first, I thought they had been stocked in the wrong section, so I read the label closely.

Nope. They were in the right place.

It was a sad moment for me tonight, people. A sad moment indeed. Pink t-shirts mixed in with Incredible Hulk pajamas.

I've always thought of Wal-Mart as the strong type. The guy with muscles. Sure, he doesn't have very good manners, but you can count on him. Wally is the guy who is a little greasy and he wears his keys on his belt loop. Wally is the one who shows up at the fancy party without a tie, but he loves his Mama and he always stands when they play the National Anthem.

Target, on the other hand, is really attractive. He smells good. He's the guy that every girl swoons over. He drives a fancy sports car and he works on Wall Street. He'll even go shopping with you. But he's the type of guy who gets a manicure and he'll never help you move.

But, Wal-Mart. Oh, Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart will do the heavy lifting.

So you can see why I was a little tearful when I discovered that Wal-Mart is selling light pink, cottony shirts to boys who should be outside riding four wheelers and eating bugs. I'd expect this from Target, but not Wally.

It was a pivotal day in my life, y'all.

Really, I should have seen it coming. It all began when they stopped selling hubcaps.


Jennifer said...

Yours was the second walmart story I read today, and I felt the need to jump on the Wally train too. (o: I don't know about your Walmart, but our Walmart got a little facelift a year ago and tried to look like Target! It's like Wally dressed like Mr. Target man, but forgot to take a shower kind of feeling! But even with my own Walmart woes I know that I'll be back again. Because I just can't stay away!

Fiddledeedee (It Coulda' Been Worse) said...

Hi Melanie,
I tried to reply to your e-mail from my "contact page" and it was returned. I have info for you about AHG. Try it again. I'll re-check your e-mail address. You should have my direct e-mail on this comment.

Anonymous said...

Sorry. Wal-Mart is the wuss and "softie." Always has been. Not to say that Target is better (and you make no mention of other chains), but they all rest easy on the tried and true fact that WE SPEND OUR MONEY there.

Linda said...

See, I think you give Target too much credit. I think Target is like a young exec, you know, movin' on up but not quite arrived. Neiman Marcus is more like your Target, I think. Oh well. I go to Walmart almost every day, so I must have a soft spot for him. We're both low maintenance, too.

Shannon@Idylwild said...

I was annoyed with the pink, too. Shopping for Easter shirts for my three boys was such a pain - they had blue, green, pink and white. For BOYS! How am I supposed to raise these boys to be good men with "boys stink" and pink tshirts?

Muddy said...

My husband was greatly disturbed by the pink shirts at Wal-Mart. It was bad enough pink shirts came through during the 80's, but to see them cycle back through in the name of "fashion" in the 00's is just too much.

PJ said...

Oh dear. what would Mr. Sam say if he were still here? He'll probably roll over in his grave. Sad day!!!