Friday, January 11, 2008

Emergency on Aisle Nine

Sunday mornings are usually a little chaotic at our house. First of all, I am not a morning person. I'm not even a mid-afternoon person. I am a night person. I have no idea why the world has decided that everything like go to church, school, the grocery store or the bank must be done during the daytime.

Unless it has something to do with that little thing call sunlight.

Anyway.

I do not wake up happy. I go to sleep happy but something occurs during my REM cycle that turns me into Cranky Lady. So when we all have to get somewhere at the same time and be dressed up, MERCY ME. And I don't mean the awesome Christian music group.

Sundays I wake up to the coffee pot shuffle and start getting ready. In the meantime, my husband wakes our daughter and starts her breakfast. My breakfast is in mug which is probably laced with lead paint.

After I get ready, it is husband's turn in the bathroom . I usually iron his clothes and then help my very decisive and fashion-minded daughter pick out her clothes. All this time, I am watching the clock and thinking,"I really hate my clothes."

I finally make it out the door on time, weighted down with Sunday School material and the grim reality that the two people with me are much better dressed than I am.

The chaos always seems to end once we get in the car- until a few Sundays ago. We were riding down the highway and I suddenly heard a thump by the passenger's (Me) door. There in the rear view mirror was a picture of my hub cap not-so-gracefully tumbling down the road.

Classy.

Don't worry. We didn't go back and get it. If it wasn't picked up by a group of prisoners in orange jumpsuits, it is probably resting on the side of the road with its new found friend, The Shoe.

My husband went to Wal-mart later to buy me a set of hubcaps. (That sentence alone paints a portrait of our life that could hang in a Motel 6 lobby.)

We have the same kind of car so he didn't check the size wheel cover needed for my car. They should be the same. Right?

Oh no. The Toyota people like to change things from one year model to the next just to keep things interesting. So hubs went to another Wal-mart close to home to exchange them. He came back empty handed.

Our local Wal-mart did not have any hubcaps.

Aren't hubcaps a staple at Wal-mart? When Sam Walton opened the very first Wal-mart in Arkansas didn't he write some sort of Wal-mart Constitution that called for the pursuit of automobile accessories, over-sized electronics and better gun selection?

Something is seriously wrong, y'all. I am starting to think that the Target folks have infiltrated the ranks of their blue vest competition.

You can breathe easy. There is a happy ending to this otherwise uninspiring post and there is still hope for Wal-mart. Hubs purchased the correct size hubcaps at the original Wal-mart and the little guys are tucked into place on my tires. I told him it was a matter of urgency.

Riding around without a hubcap is one step away from duct tape on the windshield.

I'm just sayin.'

7 comments:

Susanne said...

Now I'm going to have to go and just see if Canadian Wallymarts have hubcaps. Generally that is not a department that draws me, if you know what I mean.

Mamacita said...

I feel for you! I am queen of the night owls and I never really met a morning that I liked. :)

Jennifer Owens said...

Great story! And I agree. A missing hubcap kind of brings on that 'ghetto' feeling for me and a car feels broken or naked without them. When I got my new car - new being a 1997 Saturn - a couple of years ago, it was a step up from what I had, considering the new car had lining that was still in tact, had all four hubcaps, and decided it liked to drive when I pressed the accelerator. And to my delight it came with a CD player. Not a tape player that had a tape left in the deck that somehow melted inside which left for radio options only. I'm movin' on up now. Congrats on the hubcaps. Some things are just worth fighting for.

2nd Cup of Coffee said...

I love these little peeks into people's lives!

Tammy said...

It's been awhile but I wanted to stop by and say hi, Melanie! So..."HI!" ;)

Truly, I can relate about not being morning person and about running around trying to get ready for church on Sunday mornings. My husband can't understand why he's always ready before me, yet he does not have any shoulder length hair to deal with nor makeup to put on...um, thankfully. LOL

Roxanne said...

Yes, well, atleast he didn't wait and then tell you they were for your birthday.

Sista Cala said...

Except for the parts having to do w/your child, your post could be my story. And I too have wondered why a person couldn't go to church around 9 or 10pm instead of AM. It would be interesting to start one and find out how many like-minded folks are around.