Remembering Our Fallen Heroes

These are the times that try men's souls.

The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will,

in this crisis, shrink from the service of their country;

but he that stands by it now, deserves the love

and thanks of man and woman.

Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered;

yet we have this consolation with us,

that the harder the conflict,

the more glorious the triumph.

What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly:

it is dearness only that gives every thing its value.

Heaven knows how to put a proper price upon its goods;

and it would be strange indeed

if so celestial an article as freedom should not be highly rated.

-Thomas Paine

At Memorial Day and always, I am thankful for those who gave their lives so that I could could live in this great country called America. Thank you to the soldiers who continue to fight and stand ready to protect my freedom. It is because of them that my child can sleep peacefully tonight.

God Bless you all.

Dude, where's my paint swatch?

When you're a kid, part of the excitement of moving to a new place is picking out your new room. My daughter knew immediately which one of the extra bedrooms she wanted to be hers as soon as we walked in the house. Granted, we had not even decided to buy the house yet, but she was bound and determined that she had found her new room. I can't blame her, the windows from that room open up to a wonderful view.

As it turns out, we did settle on that house and so when we went back the other day for the final walk through, she turned to me and said,"Come on, Mommy! Let's go see my new room!"

I have always loved moving into an empty house. It's like a blank canvas ready for us to add our family's personal touches. Whether you love contemporary, country what-nots, or something somewhere in between, personal style adds so much charm and warmth to a home.

Not to mention paint choices.

Long before we even looked at this house, my daughter had selected the new color for her bedrooms walls. Her bedding has a Hawaiian print and the color choices for wall paint are abundant. I told her that she could pick the color of her room this time and she was so excited.

Being the Mom, I was thinking a girly pink or a cool blue. I should have known that a daughter of mine would know, without a doubt, exactly what color she would want. Right down to the hue or shade or whatever Nancy would tell me was the proper term.

We often drive across a bridge where the water underneath is many shades of blues and greens. As we drove across the bridge every morning to school and every afternoon after school, my daughter would point and say, "There it is, Mommy! THAT COLOR! I WANT THAT COLOR!"

Clearly, I should KNOW what color she was pointing to while I am driving and trying to look through those little rungs of concrete on the side rail. I mean, it wasn't like there were, oh about 50 shades of blue, green, blue-green, green-blue, greenish- bluish, bluish- greenish, and even a touch of grey in that vast mass of water.

I mean, it was SO OBVIOUS!

I decided that I would come clean and admit that I had absolutely no idea what color she was talking about. We went to Lowe's to look at paint choices and we took her pillow sham with us. We were standing there in front of The Wall of paint cards made of colorful squares that never, ever look like the same color when you get them home. I think paint stores must have trick lighting so that you will confidently buy an entire gallon of paint that is the perfect color, only to go home, paint it on the wall, and absolutely hate it.

And return to Lowe's to buy another gallon of paint of an entirely different color.

It's a conspiracy, really.

So we were there at The Wall and I asked her which color was the color she wanted.

"It isn't here, Mommy. They don't have it."

"You mean that out of ALL these color choices of ALL these paint brands none of these colors are the color you want for your room?"

"No."

In a pitiful attempt to find SOMETHING, I began to randomly pull color cards from The Wall.

"How about this color?"

"No. That's not it."

"Well, how about this one?"

"No. They don't have it."

She had just about given up. Then she pulled a little pamphlet from the display.

She opened it up, then with wide eyes, she pointed to a teeny, tiny square of a lovely, light green and said,"THAT'S IT! THAT'S THE COLOR!"

I was so glad I took her with me to choose the color. Otherwise, we would be right back at Lowe's buying a second gallon of paint.

Some may say she was being a little too picky, but I love a girl who knows what she wants.

:>)

I'll take that midnight train, please.

What do Jerry Springer and Bette Midler have in common?

They were both on American Idol tonight.

What a night. Talk about diversity of musical genre.

Congratulations, Jordin! I hope you make your mama proud. May you set a new standard and example for the young, female musical artists. You have the chance to make a difference for young girls across the US by setting a good example of modesty and integrity.

Random Epiphanies

1. I was giddy, just giddy as a school girl when my husband walked in the door this evening with loads and loads of good, clean, stain-free boxes from the grocery store. I realized that when you get more excited about the boxes than your hubs, you've been married a loooonnngg time.

2. I felt sorry for Blake on AI tonight. The new song just didn't fit his voice. Jordin is going to win. I still miss Melinda.

I'm feeling real emotion for complete strangers! This is too much. Can you say "AI Addict?"

3. I was packing my daughter's stuffed animals and I am fairly certain they have been breeding in her room.

4. I'm actually looking forward to cleaning my new house. I think I've inhaled too much cardboard dust.

5. I don't understand how a show about people getting tattoos made it on the air. Can you imagine the pitch, "We want to show people paying other people to be tortured. When it's all over, they will leave in tears and have a deeper understanding of life and a very sore arm."

6. Having to look for boxes and busily packing is a wonderful blessing. There are many people tonight who have nowhere to lay their head. I certainly do not deserve it, but I am very thankful to be moving into a home we can call our own. I pray that I never take any gift He has given for granted and that I will always share what He has given with others.

Have a good evening!

It's only garbage if you aren't moving.

I'm seriously considering changing my blog to "I Lost My Coffee" or "I really should be packing."

We are starting our move in a few days and a moment in the blogosphere is like a day at the spa for me. So, thanks to all of you in my blogroll you have updated your posts.

I don't mind packing. Really. I just don't care for begging for boxes. OK. I hate it. If I could go to just one place and get all the cardboard refuse I need, then it would be fine. But, dumspter diving is not a skill to which I aspire.

Thanks to all of the treehuggers, now you can be selective about your dumpster diving. It's about options, people. There are "cardboard only," "Keep doors closed," and my personal favorite, "This stinks to high heaven. How desperate are you?" (I made that one up.)

Lucky for me, the kind folks at Dollar General offered some of their boxes right off the sales floor. Bless their hearts.

I went back to DG for a few more boxes yesterday and the boxes had already been thrown away in the clean and neat "cardboard only" dumpster. The sweet young clerk generously offered me an invitation to dig through the dumpster and then gave me some very important advice, "Just don't go back there after dark."

Thanks for the tip.

;>)

A Mall Meme

I saw this meme over at Clemntine's place and since I am brain dead from inhaling all of the cardboard dust from this little thing we call "moving and makin' mama crazy" I am thankful for a meme.

I'm just sayin.'

Here are the rules-

You get to create your own Mall. Choose 6 stores that would definitely be included in your ideal one stop mall. Then as a bonus you can pick your favorite restaurant and fast food eatery to be located there, too. After you’ve created it, post it and tag some bloggers to join in the fun.


Melanie's Malleria


1. Target- Target in a mall? Yes! Discover the glory of it all.

2. Dollar Tree- A really good one. Not a lame one. The place has to be full to the ceiling with cheaply made goods that I must have for only one buck.

3. Macy's- Hey, I'm cheap, but I still have taste. I like their home furnishings department.

4. A cute little gift shop that has everything for every birthday gift, baby gift, and just plain I gotta have it item. Includes a sweet Southern lady who calls me darlin' and offers to wrap nearly everything I purchase for free. She has a dog in the back that stays there with her all day to keep her comp'ny.

5. A Christian book, music and gift store. With a coffee shop inside.

6. A fun toy store where my daughter and I can splurge on more stuffed animals that will collect dust. :>)


Restaurant- A small town eatery where everyone recognizes me and they are all related to the lady at the gift shop. The menu offers daily specials and the tables always have nice tablecloths and fresh flowers.

Fast food- Chick-fil-A, yum

If you decide to do this meme, leave a note in the comments! Have fun.

My niece, the philospher.

I love being a mom. It is so much fun- playing, crafting, stealing kisses and hugs. So far, being an aunt to Miss Molly has its little rewards, too. We'll get to craft and play (when she can, you know, hold her head up) and I don't have to deal with messy diapers on a daily basis.

Not to mention the stories. Oh, the stories have already begun.

T and C (Molly's parents, not a rap band) were out shopping for a family vehicle. Like most of us, they never envisioned themselves riding around town in a sedan or a station wagon. Like most of us before we had kids, we said we would never be caught dead in a van.

Then we learned that a Corvette convertible doesn't hold a lot of baby stuff, i.e- stroller, pack and play, bottles, clean diapers, dirty diapers. Plus, the kid has to ride somewhere.

So T and C have started looking for a safe and affordable van for the growing family. Last weekend they visited a local dealer. They aren't amateurs at car buying. No, M'am. They had done their research and knew exactly what price range their van of choice should fall in.

Then they met that guy, Mr." starched white shirt and khakis" guy. Mr. "I have only 2 ties and the other one is in the bottom of the hamper" guy. Mr. "Am I wearing enough after shave for ya?" guy.

That guy. The used car salesman.

T and C found a van they really liked. The salesman tried to trick them into an overinflated sale price saying, "With this much down, at this percent interest, this would be your payment."

T kept saying,"Just give me the bottom line. What is the total price?"

The salesman danced around the question, answering, "This would be your payment."

T kept asking.

The salesman kept dancing.

They knew he was trying to trick them into a huge price because they could, you know, add. Plus they didn't even need to finance. That guy just wouldn't listen.

C was sitting in the passenger's front seat with the salesman in the driver's seat. The salesman kept spouting out lies. T was in the back seat feeding Molly when Molly let out a sound from inside her diaper that told that car salesman exactly what she thought.

C calmly turned to the salesman and said,"She said what you are saying is a bunch of cr*p."

The salesman answered,"That's not what she said."

Like any good parents would do, they took the advice,if you will, of their infant daughter over that guy because she's got more brains than he does.

And more gas.

They say it's her birthday...

Today is my dear friend Lucy's birthday. Her name isn't really Lucy, but somehow a few years ago I told her that we were Lucy and Ethel. I was Ethel (not Cousin Ethel.)

Let me tell you a few things about Lucy...

She is an awesome mom. She is totally devoted to her daughter and takes parenting very seriously.

She loves her family.

She is a caretaker and a nurturer.

She has sacrificed so much (willingly) for people in her life. She is a giver.

She loves, loves, loves a good cup of coffee.

She is very organized. She knows how many monkeys are in her kids' barrel of monkeys. (Something I cannot relate to. :>))

She is a talented singer, actress and musician.

She is crafty.

She's smart.

She loves red lipstick. (a girl after my own heart!)

She loves good food and she isn't afraid to "eat like a real woman." (No nibbles for us! We can put down some groceries!)

She is an awesome cook and hostess.

She loves animals and once took in a mama cat and kittens, and then took them with her during a hurricane evacuation. With her child, her two dogs, cat, and two turtles. Yes, m'am. She did.

She is my sister in Christ and I love her.

Happy Birthday, Lucy. You got some 'xplainin to dooooo.

Click here to enjoy one of the best scenes with Lucy and Ethel!!

Finally, some real writing talent in the family.

My daughter asked to put something on my blog. This is her latest favorite story. Her teacher asked the class to write about a "shy purple pig."

THE SHY PURPLE PIG

Once their was a planet called purple planet. Evrything was purple. Egsept for the people and the animals! But Shy purple pig happened to be purple. One day purple pig overheard the Farmer talking to a detectives’ boss about him. O.K.,Il’ take Him. Shy purple pig, Welcome to the detective life. I need you to go out there and be a detective. So he did.
THE END

This post could save your life, or just make you want a doughnut.

According to a recent news article, people in the South are more likely to have a stroke than folks in other regions of the US.

Go figure.

The article goes on to say (I shall paraphrase a bit) we Southerners are having strokes left and right because we are fat, lazy, uneducated, are smoking like chimney stacks and running up our blood sugar with all of those Krispy Kreme doughnuts.

Now I know I might not be the sharpest knife in the drawer, but don't insult my blood glucose levels. ;>)

Call it a hunch, but I'm thinking this high incidence of stroke may be related to all the meat we eat. You know, the meat that has been cooked in fat (which came from some other meat source). Never mind that we boil all of the nutrients out of our vegetables and season them with more meat (or just fat.) Even our bread has Crisco in it.

Rumor has it that somebody in Stark, Mississippi came up with a butter flavored ice cream.

OK. That last sentence? I made it up. Everybody knows that people from Mississippi don't eat butter flavored anything. They eat butter, not butter substitutes.

I do not mean to make light of the serious, life-threatening, debilitating medical condition known as stroke. Just consider this my silly attempt to get your attention. A healthy diet, exercise, and regular check-ups with your doctor are key to stroke prevention.

You should also know what to do if you or someone you love experiences a stroke. Time lost is brain lost.

So while you're sitting there at your computer eating your buttered biscuit and fried chicken, take a moment to read the warning signs of a stroke.

The information could save a life. That life could be yours.

Love-Me-Knots. Check it out!

Bows, bows, bows.

They've got your precious bows, here.

Bows. Who wants bows?

Have you visited Love-Me-Knots? Mommy Dearest and her friend Melissa have launched an awesome website where you can purchase handcrafted bows for your sweet girl or grand girl. You'll love the gorgeous ribbons for those curls and you'll love knowing you've helped two great stay at home moms.

SO, check it out! You'll be glad you did.

See you soon, Melinda

I can't believe Melinda was voted off.

Maybe it is all a blessing in disguise? Without the AI title, Melinda can have a little more creative freedom and really make her music all her own. Can I just say that I really have admired that she has dressed and acted appropriately on stage? She managed to be stylish without being immodest.

Looking forward to the CD, Melinda!

YOU ARE W-O-M-A-N!!

Random blips in my brain

Updated to add: Your comments are proof that you guys are quite the intuitive ones, too! Lovin' your comments. Fun. Thanks.

It's really frightening, the things I think about throughout the day. Other people are spending time planning healthy meals for their families, saving the planet or discovering cures for cancer. I'm just trying to make sure my clothes match.

Consider these my deep thoughts for the day. (Scary.)


1. While I was watching one of those commode (Mommy Dearest, I didn't say "toilet." Wink Wink) cleaner commercials, I kept noticing how much they claimed that the product killed germs. They even get all mathematical about it and use a decimal point- "99.9 % of harmful bacteria."

I like a sparkling bowl, if you will, but has it ever occurred to anyone what is going to go in there after we have disinfected it? Ahem.

I'm thinking 100% harmful bacteria.

So, let's do a good job cleaning the commode and focus more attention on the bathroom sink.

Just a thought.

2. Has anyone noticed that the Geico gecko has a different British dialect? Did they think we wouldn't notice? It's like when they replaced Darrin Stephens with a new Darrin on Bewitched. They tried to switch them on the sly; the actors even had the same first name.

I want to know. What happened to the first gecko? Did they fail to renew his contract or did he meet a tragic ending, one where his tail didn't grow back?

3. I think the actress who plays Meredith on Grey's Anatomy needs a new hairdo.

4. I think Jennifer Anniston's face is getting longer.

5. I think Cracker Barrel is a weird name for a restaurant that doesn't sell crackers. Or barrels.

And who is the old man sitting next to the barrel in the logo?

6. I don't understand why it is OK to drink coffee and listen to Diana Krall in Barnes and Noble but it is not OK to have a snack and whisper in the public library.

I'm just sayin.'

7. I realized today that I have become a connoisseur of chicken nuggets. They could feature me on Food Network.

Or not.

There's an iPod in the henhouse.

I've been buying more organic foods. We have switched to organic milk, eggs, and some meats. The organic meats are a little more difficult to find.

The switch isn't just for hubs and me, but for our daughter. Years from now folks may say organic was much ado about nothing but for now, I am not sure the added hormones are safe. (The organic milk actually tastes better! Seriously!)

I don't mind a little pesticide sprinkled on my fruits and veggies. I figure that I can wash those off. OK. Truth is, I'm cheap. We may go totally organic with that food group, too. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe next week. Maybe when the prices go down...

Yesterday, while at Publix, I found a new (for me) brand of organic eggs- The Country Hen. I read the package late last night while making cupcakes and had to chuckle. These cage free hens are living the life in "sunlit barns and porches."

I am soooo glad I found The Country Hen. I just hate those snooty city hens strutting down Madison Avenue in their big Prada sunglasses with their blackberries and MP3 players. Don't you?

;>)

The last 24 hours in a nutshell.

1. Drove to my parents' house for a short, but sweet Mother's Day visit.

2. Saw a Piggly Wiggly, a small town square, tall pines, short bridges over "branches" (instead of "creeks"), brown thrashers, mockingbirds, cows, horses, and one mama deer and baby standing on the side of the road.

3. Smelled the aroma of speckled butter beans pressure cooking on the stove, jasmine on the vine, and smoke that had traveled for miles from the Georgia Fires still burning.

4. Heard a little girl giggle with her PaPa.

5. Tasted way too many speckled butter beans, some pork roast, a Hardee's breakfast biscuit, homemade hamburgers and pound cake. (It's a good thing I was only there for one night!)

6. Enjoyed the sweetness of being a mother and a daughter all at the same time.

And did I mention the butter beans?

Remember the mothers of Virginia Tech

Please pray for the mothers of those precious young students who lost their lives at Virginia Tech.

This will certainly be a difficult Mother's Day for all of them.

Our prayers are with you all.

You're A Gem, Girlfriend

Your husband trusts you with the checkbook, the car, and the kids.
You promise not to nag him
as you pick up his socks for the rest of your life.

You seek wrinkle-free, stain-resistant fabrics
and use a "warm iron as needed."

You are like the UPS truck bringing goods from afar,
buying ground beef on sale at Winn Dixie and organic milk from Publix.

You can smell a deal at Target from a mile a away.

You are still up at midnight making lunches for your kids
and you remember to cut the sandwiches in little triangles instead of squares.

You considered a field, but settled on a Mary Kay home business,
and with the sale of lipsticks and nail polish, you help pay the mortgage.

You go to the gym for aerobics class once a week,
or at least do weight training- lifting toys off the floor.

You help your neighbors, buy Girl Scout cookies and
volunteer many hours to the PTA.

You take your children to Sunday School and teach them about Jesus.

You make your best potato salad for all the church suppers
and you always take a cake to someone after a death in the family.

You are not afraid of anything (except maybe spiders)
as you care for your family with strength and courage.

You can't sew a stitch
but you sure know how to dress for less.

You always try to say a kind word
or say nothing at all.

You take care of your husband and children each day
without concern for yourself.

You are a Mother.

This Mother's Day, may your children call you blessed
or at least, you know, call you.

May your husband also praise you,
or just compliment you on your cooking.

Happy Mother's Day!

Pat, I'd like to buy a 4 bedroom, 2.5 bath traditional with equity.

We could be the next Reality Show. Combine Designed to Sell, Buy Me, and Wheel of Fortune. Add a dash of Roseanne and Claire Huxtable and you've got yourself a hit.

We may even make into syndication, people.

Y'all know we have been house hunting. We've also been trying to sell a home. We have found a house we adore and are in the process of dotting all the i's and crossing all the t's and making sure the dollar signs have two slashes instead of just one and that termites aren't overtaking the subflooring. Meanwhile, we are in the middle of negotiations with a potential buyer and playing the "I'll counter that offer Game." You know, it's been like a trip to the spa. Only the lady doing the pedicure? It's her first day. And she has big sheep shears for nail clippers, she's nearsighted and in a VERY BAD MOOD.

I'm just sayin'. Buying a home while selling a home? It's a blast.

I am not much for bartering and negotiation. I always hate that part. I don't see why they just can't sell homes the same way they sell shoes. I mean, can you picture me going in Belk and saying, "Excuse me, M'am. I see these sandals are marked for $49.99. Could you sell them to me for only $24.99 and throw in a matching bag?"

They'd think I was nuts.

Most of the time, I feel like I'm on a game show and I just keep spinning the wheel, crossing my unmanicured fingers (since the nail lady scared me from the pedicure), watching the wheel slowly, slowly come to a stop and praying, just praying that little clippy thing doesn't pop over to "Bankrupt" or "Lose A Turn."

I would love a Free Spin at this point.

I know that God is in control and we do pray that we make decisions that will honor Him. It is His money after all. I just hope I don't end up having to pick some cheesy prizes, like a tacky dog statue or a velvet dolphin painting for my new family room.

Or solve a puzzle like this one-

Hey, Vanna, give me a nerve pill.

Seven strange things about me that aren't in my purse.

Military Mommy is soooo patient. She tagged me for the purse meme a while ago. My digital camera is being temperamental, so now I just give up. I am going to post without the picture. You guys are brilliant and I have complete confidence that you can picture all of the lint and loose change in the bottom of the bag.

I have a few purses, not many. I usually only change them with the seasons. I have a few for summer, but the one I keep going back to is my favorite. It is a black and white toile fabric tote with some cute black fringe. It really can go with summer or winter. I bought it a craft fair from a wonderfully talented lady. It's a gem.

If you ask my husband, he'll tell you that you can't find a thing in my purse, but "OH CONTRAIRE!" I can find the following items:

My red wallet (easy to find in any bag)
Pens
Old receipts that I don't need until I throw them away
Lipstick
Compact
Medicines
Neosporin
An unsharpened pencil that reads "I survived the test"

If and when my camera takes its Prozac and changes moods, I'll take a picture for y'all.



His Singer tagged me for this Meme-
Seven Things You Never Knew About Me and Were Smart Enough Not to Ask

Maybe it wasn't exactly worded like that. ;>)

1. I don't like to eat out by myself. I would rather go through the drive thru and eat in the car, or just take it home. I realize this is odd.

2. I once caught a shark. (small one, about 3 feet long)

3. I love to smell play dough.

4. When we first married, we bought our first washer and dryer. The dryer wasn't drying well and I told my husband about it. He said, "Did you empty the lint filter?"

I said, "The what?"

Mama's dryer had the lint filter in the door. Our dryer had a lint filter on top. Since our dryer didn't have one in the door, I assumed it simply didn't have one at all. Go ahead and laugh.

When my husband emptied the lint filter after months of use, the blanket of lint was so large, you could curl up with it on a cold night and stay warm. I don't recommend this method of domestication. Let's say it together, FIRE HAZARD.

5. I still eat Spaghetti-O's.

6. When I was a kid I buried a time capsule in my parents' backyard. I can't remember where I buried it. My husband has tried to find it since we got married. It is driving him crazy.

7. I cried when I went to Gettysburg. So much loss of life in one place. Very sad.

What do fear and apathy have to do with my floors?

This commercial bothers me on so many levels.

Watch it and come back. (It's the commercial for the floor that supposedly withstands anything and involves a scary movie, some much-too-young-to-see-it kids, and a sad little dog.)

This is what upsets me-

Why are the parents letting their kids watch this movie?
The only family member that is frightened by it is the dog.
This shows absolutely no sensitivity.
The poor dog. Oh, if you don't care about the kids, the dog should make you sad.
He has an accident and they just look at him.
No one consoles him.
No one cleans up the mess.

Am I too sensitive?

Comments, please.

Edited to add- You guys don't have to agree with me to leave a comment. I realize I think in black and white sometimes- funny, since my blog has so much grey. :>)

Lessons From The ER

It has been one of those days.

My daughter had a stomach virus and let's just say that it has tested my strong maternal constitution. I won't get into the gross details, but the virus forced us to visit the emergency room.

I love the ER almost as much as I love Newman. I'm torn between the two, really.

This visit was actually pleasant, as pleasant as is possible, considering that your daughter has wretched and heaved and you are both sleep-deprived and there are strange people shuffling around in bath slippers watching a television that for some reason must be suspended from the ceiling.

But I digress.

The nurses were fabulous. The doctor was fabulous. And back to the nurses- one of them had the most delightful accent. It sounded French. I'm not sure, but it was delightful.

My daughter needed IV fluids. (Ouch! She was so brave.) She is a different child now and feeling much better.

To stay in the true ER Visit Tradition, I have to share what I learned today. I'm all about bein' educated.

1. The emergency room is the last place to be if you have a phobia of germs. That little shower curtain is a sad excuse for protection from the unknown on the other side. And we all know what literally lies on the other side.

A very sick person who is either vomitting their lunch or coughing up a lung, or both.

And then they call for the bed pan.

2. If you are lucky, (as we were today) and the person on the other side is not hurling or hacking, they will in fact have one of the following conditions:

A skin infection
Strep throat
A strange insect bite
Back pain (can we say "drug seeking?")

3. All emergency rooms are painted pink, blue or pink and blue. I think it is to calm the patients. Or the staff.

4. When your kid has just finished vomitting for the past 36 hours and you yourself have had nothing decent to eat, the staff will invariably heat up their lunch in the breakroom microwave and the delicious aroma will manage to waft down the hall and cross the shower curtain barrier, reaching you, the starved, sleep-deprived mom.

5. Since you are a mom and nothing that your kid does ever makes you sick, you actually get hungry when you smell the microwaved meal. (Let's face it; you can change a d*aper and eat a peanut butter sandwich.)

6. Bendy straws are a kid's best friend.

7. Sitting by the bedside with a sick child reminds you of all the times your Mama sat with you. You opened your eyes in the soft, quiet darkness and saw her still there. Then you closed your eyes and drifted off to sleep.

8. Motherhood, with all the bodily fluids that come with it, is the best job on Earth.

:>)

Friday Feast

Appetizer: Name something you would not want to own.

A self-help book titled "How To Lose Your Southernness."

Soup: Describe your hair (texture, color, length, etc.).

Thick, foiled with bleach, chin length, and needing to be styled at this moment. Underneath all of the carninogenic glory it is very brown, except for the streaks of grey that keep popping up.

Salad: Finish this sentence:

I’ll never forget my wedding day or the day my daughter was born.




Main Course: Which famous person would you like to be for one day? Why?

Susan B. Anthony. She is one of very few women in history I respect and admire. She was a Christian and an educated woman.

But, if this character was a real person (and not a character) I would like to meet this woman-

"I'm not as sweet as I used to be."

Dessert: Write one sentence about yourself that includes one thing that is true and another thing that is not.

I am a size 4 and I bought my wedding dress for 50% off.

Put a 1 in front of that 4 and it is a true statement.

I paid for my own wedding dress and was so proud! I had been on my own for a few years and wanted to contribute. My parents gave us a very nice and beautiful wedding, of course. (There was no red velvet armadillo cake in the garage.) :>)

Today is For Heather

Is it no coincidence that today is The National Day of Prayer?

Please Pray for Heather

Heather is having surgery tomorrow- brain surgery.

I cannot imagine the awesome strength and faith she must need to go through this. But I can imagine and know the awesome God who will see her through. He loves her and her family more than they could possibly dream.

Let's join together in Christ tomorrow to pray for Heather, the medical team, her husband, and her children.

May God be exalted.

Works For Me: Birthday Cake Delivery

I believe everyone should have a special birthday. Maybe it is because Mama always made mine special. I was a December baby, so Mama tried to make sure my birthday didn't disappear into Christmas.

Anyhoo. Birthdays hold a special place in my heart.

I also believe everyone, no matter how old they are, should have a birthday cake.

If you know someone out of town who lives alone or just doesn't have someone to make a cake for them, you can have one delivered to them! Granted, they aren't as good as homemade, but as they say,"it's the thought that counts."

Here are a few links to check out:

Send A Cake
1-800-Bakery.Com

American Idol: Quote of the Week

"I want the camera to get my slim side." Miss Kiki

You go, girl!

Who do they see when they look at me?

I want others to see Jesus in me.
What do they see in my eyes when I look at them? Compassion? Judgement?
I could have lived their life instead.

"Instead"
Stacie Orrico

I saw him shaking his change in a coffee cup
Asked for a dollar but I told the man to give it up
Said he's hungry I don't think that it's true
I bet my dollar he'd just spend it on booze
I turned my back on him and began to walk away
But then I heard a little voice inside me say
What if it's really true? What if he's hungry?
What if it's not for him? Does he have a family?
How'd you get here
How'd you end up on the street
Where did you go wrong
Wonder what I'd do if it were me

A new point of view
A walk in your shoes
I wish I could get inside your head
To see what you see
When you look at me
Cause I could have lived your life instead

It was 90 degrees in the Summer heat
She was veiled in black all the way down to her feet
This is America doesn't she know
Somebody take her shopping buy her some clothes
She came up to me I didn't understand a word
I was about to leave then another thought occurred
She must be really lost scared and frustrated
I should try again to see what she's saying
How'd you get hereHow'd you get so far from home
What was it that made you leave
Wonder what I'd do if it were me

A new point of view
A walk in your shoes
I wish I could get inside your head
To see what you see when you look at me
Cause I could have lived your life instead

I wanna see oh see what you see
And I wanna feel oh feel just what you feel

Cuz I could have lived your life instead

It's A Free Country

While I joke on occasion about immodest clothes and not wanting to see a coffee server's undergarments, I am very thankful that I live in a free country where people can choose their hairstyles, clothing, piercings, or tattoos. Or I can wear my red lipstick and big hair if I so choose. :>)

Thank goodness our country does not have this.

Thanks to God who has allowed our country to be free and to Jesus who has set me free!

May I never take it for granted.

OK, Linda, you'd better call for those press conferences now.

For whatever reason, I am in this mood of writing about what I would do for the prison system, the country, world peace and bad hair.

OK. Bad hair is pushing it a bit.

So, I got to thinking about what else I could do to "contribute" ahem to society. Just be patient, folks. 'Kay? I am sure this little montage of nonsensical trivia will pass.

Foreign Policy-

Whenever one of our enemies does something that is threatening our freedom, democracy, and pursuit of good hair, I'll just say, "Don't make me come over there."

That's only if "The Look" doesn't work. See, I'm all about diplomacy to a point. So first I'll try a less forceful approach. My policy may or may not follow this order. (I'm a mom and the leader of the free world. My policy is subject to change right along with my hair color.)

1. The Look.
2. The Threat.
3. The Countdown. "1, 2, 3, don't make me count to 5..."
4. The I'll Put the Fear of God in you.

'Nough said.


Domestic Policy (and I don't mean who does the housekeeping)

-The first order of business is Labor Day. No one can wear white after this holiday. It just isn't done.

-Next is hunger in the US. No one will go to bed hungry unless they sassed their Mama.

-Everyone is required to take a course in manners and must carry a license as proof. If you are rude to a waitress in a restaurant or you decide to blow your nose in the middle of Pastor Bill's Easter sermon, you are required to pay a fine of $100 which will go towards the waitress's tip or the offering plate.

-Every US Citizen gets a birthday cake on their birthday. That's final.

-On a more serious note, if you have ever hurt a child, tried to hurt a child or even thought about hurting a child, (I'm a mom. I can read minds) I will personally come over there and follow the steps of the "Foreign Policy" only I will skip steps 1-3 and go straight to the Fear of God part.

Don't make me count to 1.


Military Policy

-Every person who serves or has ever served in the US military will never go hungry.

Unless he sassed his Mama.

-Every US citizen is required to take a course to learn the real sacrifice our military make. In order to complete the class, they must write "Freedom isn't free" 500 times while singing the National Anthem. (yes, they would have to learn the words.)

Miscellaneous

It is illegal to whine.

Pantyhose and uncomfortable support garments are banned.

No person will be discriminated against based on their race, gender, religion, Alma Mater, or NASCAR affiliation.

And just because I am in a good mood, I declare every Friday as Carbohydrate Day. See ya at Krispy Kreme!

:>)

Consider this my little contribution to society.

Our prison systems don't seem to work. Once the prisoners serve their time, they just end up right back in, so I have come up with a new plan of scaring our prisoners into never committing a crime again.

Here goes...

1. During the interrogation process, if the crook won't talk, lock him alone in the room with a screaming toddler who refuses to eat. The only food available to feed the kid is beets and tofu. The crook must either talk or get the kid to eat.

That bandit will sing, I tell ya.

2. Once you've gotten the criminal to confess, he must wear the required prison uniform-

Support hose, a girdle, and a bridesmaid's dress. These were used in medieval torture chambers throughout Europe.

3. After diving for the bride's bouquet and ripping his pantyhose, he must be forced to participate in the following domestic tasks:

- Taking down 1960's vinyl wallpaper
- Removing mystery stains from upholstery
- Vacuuming the mini-van of a soccer mom and identifying all the molded objects found under the seat
- Paying all of the bills of a household on time through illness, vacation, and a death in the family.
- Sheepishly taking a pewk-stained comforter to the local cleaners
- When filling out the form for the cleaners, fill in "Child's Vomit Odor" in the needs special attention portion.
- Seek the help of any reputable repair man while spouse is away on business and the washing machine and every single toilet in the house are all broken. And everyone has the flu.

4. Watch every single episode of Teletubbies and The Wiggles.

5. Wake up at 5:00 AM Pacific Time in order to secure reservations for the Disney Breakfast with Cinderella at Disney World.

6. Take out a second mortgage in order to purchase the official Disney Cinderella dress-up outfit and the official glass slippers made of official Disney plastic so that the screaming toddler can be dressed appropriately for the Cinderella breakfast.

7. Wake up at 4:00 AM the day after Thanksgiving in order to stand in line at Wal-mart so that you can fight with 200 other sleepy moms over this year's new Cinderella toy that your toddler wants for Christmas because she had breakfast with Cinderella and now she wants nothing but Cinderella everything and I'm sorry, but Belle just won't do.

8. Assemble the Cinderella toy on Christmas morning after removing 100 plastic bread ties and the remains of a mystery stain on the box which may or may not be considered forensic evidence related to an alleged dispute with an alleged mom who thought she was going to get the last of this year's new Cinderella toy at Wal-mart but boy, you showed her.

Allegedly.

9. Go to the post office. This may seem like cake to you, but it is pure torture to me.

:>)

Mulder drinks grande skinny latte with a shot of cinnamon dolce.

My friend Christy and I decided to go for Starbucks this morning. She mentioned a new one that had just opened down the street and since there just aren't enough Starbucks popping up all over the US, we trekked the 1.5 miles down the road, you know, to check out the landscaping.

A totally different Starbucks and we actually got out of the car. Call us adventurous!

So we were there sipping our liquid doughnuts when a clean cut gentleman walked in with dark classes, a badge and a gun. Christy leaned over and whispered to me,"He's FBI."

She pointed over to another man waiting for his coffee and said, "He's FBI, too."

As we chatted about kids and school, more men in dark glasses walked in. Between sips of coffee, Christy would pause to say, "He's FBI, too."

I finally stopped to ask,"Wait. Is there some kind of FBI office close by? I'm starting to get a little paranoid."

She informed me that there was indeed an office nearby. She then pointed out that one of the agents in the coffee house was married to her former boss and that "I hope he doesn't recognize me. I look AWFUL and I would just hate for him to go home to his wife and tell her he saw me out like this!"

There are criminals with their mugs on display in post offices everywhere evading capture. I'm pretty sure that most of them are not in Starbucks ordering a triple venti mocha, but hey- who knows? There are in fact, moms who look like they just rolled out of bed, sleepily rubbing their eyes, plotting to overthrow laundry stains while avoiding detection of a local FBI agent.

So we did what most women would do in our situation. We slipped out the side door- not to evade capture, but to avoid the possibility of one FBI agent telling his wife that Christy was out in public in her yoga pants and no make-up.

Adventurous and stealthy. Just call us Thelma and Louise.

It's a good thing I'm a mom or I would have nothing to post.

Random Stuff


Before school...

After getting up and eating pancakes, my daughter curls up under the quilt with Big Fat Cat.

"Look, Mommy. I'm playin' the Cat-Tar."

Moments later...

"It's time to get dressed for school."

"I can't. I'm in charge of the Kitty Cat Spa Foundation."


One day recently when hubs came home from work...

"How was your day, Daddy? Did you check columns and columns of numbers that someone else checked and that someone will check after you?"

"Yep."

Beauty is in the ears of the beholder.

Me- "Sweetie, what makes a lady pretty?"

Daughter- "Ummm... her hair."

Me- "What if she doesn't have pretty hair or what if she doesnt' have any hair? Can she still be pretty?"

Daughter- "Yes."

Me- "Then what would make her pretty?"

Daughter- "Her attitude."

Me- "Anything else?"

Daughter- "Her voice."

Me- "What does a pretty voice sound like?"

Daughter- "Like yours."

:>)

Technically, we're NOT related.

On top of all this, my Aunt Barbara's husband's cousin Margaret, who is Full Blown Southern High Maintenance, must have her hair done.

Margaret lives in a small town about a 30 minute drive from Waycross, the epicenter of the dangerous fires burning as I type. Margaret's little town may only have two red lights, but it does have more than a few beauty shops.

But that simply won't do.

No, M'am.

Margaret called all of her brothers to ask one of them to drive her all the way to Waycross to get her hair done because come fire or high water, she was gonna look good. Folks in Waycross are fleeing for life and limb, sleeping on cots in churches and elementary school lunchrooms.

But Margaret needs a shampoo and set.

I don't know if one of the brothers gave in and actually drove her into the smokey haze of danger. I sure hope not.

If it wasn't so ridiculous in a time like this, it would be funny.

Georgia Fires

Updated to Add: My family who evacuated were able to return home. Their homes are fine. Others are not going to be so fortunate. The fires are nowhere close to being contained. Please continue to pray for the people affected, especially for the brave firefighters.

Southeast Georgia, a place near and dear to my heart, is being threatened and partially destroyed by fire. Firefighters are working around the clock and they are exhausted.

Some of my family have been forced to leave their homes. Please pray for the people, property, the firefighters and for the awesome wildlife and vegetation. If you have ever been to the Okefenokee Swamp, you know its unique beauty.

As of now, my parents (who currently live in Albany in Southwest Georgia) are here visiting and we cannot even get through the phone lines to check on our relatives who are dealing with these fires. Those who have left, are safe, but, the fire is spreading and more people may have to leave. That is the news we are waiting for.

I'll keep you posted.

'Cause there's something about Oran "Juice" Jones

I just read Big Mama's list of her 7 favorite songs and saw the cutest picture of her e-vah! The girl knows good hair.

As memes go, I've decided to make my own list of some of my 7 favorite songs. (There are just so many!) You may be a little surprised at a few and can I just say that a list of ONLY 7 is very hard for me. I love music. All music. Well, almost all music. I am not fond of the offensive stuff- you know, the stuff they play in the elevator. ;>)

1. Something About You- Level 42. If you weren't a teen in the 80's, you have no idea what I am talking about and if you were, you may still have no idea what I am talking about. I would bet you would know if you saw the video- the one with the train and the clown. Are you lost yet? I love the medley. It makes me want to sing with the radio in the car or Old Navy, or wherever I am.

2. The Rain- Oran "Juice" Jones. Feelin' crunchy like cornflakes without the milk. If you have heard it, you are laughing. right. now.

3. The One- Elton John. This was our wedding dance song. I love the lyrics. No one can write like Elton.

4. Georgia- Ray Charles. I'm a sap. And please, for the love of Pete, bless your heart, Michael Bolton, you just cannot compete with Ray.

5. Been Caught Stealin'- Jane's Addiction. For some reason, this is funny to me. I know. I'm weird. (I don't think it is meant to be taken seriously.)

6. Battle Hymn of The Republic- Makes me cry. every. single. time.

7. Cowboy Take Me Away- Dixie Chicks. They may not be PC, but they can sang. Until they deny Jesus, I still like them. Sorry folks.

These are just a sample of my favs. If you want to do this meme, leave a note in the comments.

Prayer Request

A very dear friend of mine is hurting right now. Someone in their family is going through an awful trial of faith and determination.

Would all of you please lift them up in prayer? I am sorry I can't go into the details, but God knows and He loves them all.

Thank you, dear Internets! Y'all are awesome.

:>)

Rocking Chairs, Rainbows, AND Shopping!

Did y'all know that Brenda has a new gift shop over at CafePress?

Check it out! There are some really great Christian items available with a touch of Brenda's humor and encouragement.

Great job, Brenda!

For Heather

It's time to love on Heather and her family. See BooMama to find out how you can donate.

And remember, everyone can help Heather.

She needs our prayers and our encouragement most of all.

A Little Contest

Cause we could use some comic relief today.

BooMama is having a little contest over at her house and as Martha would say it is More Fun, More Fun! The deadline for entries is tonight @ 6:00 PM Central Time.

The post is funny in its own right, but the comments, Sweet Mercy! You'd better make a trip to the ladies' room before you start reading.

Best I can tell, the comments are proof that a southern woman does not let invitations or personal tragedy interfere with her opportunity to have good hair.

It's all about priorities, people.

Tragedy Strikes Campus, God's People Cry Out

What? Parents Crying, Children Dying, A Nation Grieving

Where? Virginia, My Town, Your Town, Our Town

When? April 16, 2007, Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow

How? Evil overcomes the heart of one in a fallen world

Why? The evil seeks to devour and destroy.

Who? College students, faculty, his son, her daughter, your son, your daughter,

my son, my daughter...

His Grief

His Town

His Time

His Sons and Daughters

His Vengeance

His Amazing Love

May God be with the families who grieve the loss of their children today.

Our hearts are with you.

*photo courtesy of Associated Press

For Molly's Mom

Molly comes home today. Remember the time we talked and I told you I wouldn't give you any advice?

I lied.

So here goes...

Nothing will prepare you for Mommyhood. No book or manual or parenting class. Though they have good intentions, even our own mothers cannot prepare us for Mommyhood.

Since the day we told them, "You are going to be a grandma!" they have been there for us. They listened to us complain about morning sickness and rejoice at the first fluttering feelings of life growing inside our tummies. They saw us get bigger, and bigger, and bigger... and may I just say, they could have kept those observations to themselves? Ahem.

But, that's what they do. They're mothers.

Mothers are there when we go into labor- whether it is on time or surprisingly early. They try to tell their daughters about the pain. But, Oh. Sweet. Mercy. No one on God's green earth can prepare you for that.

Let me take a moment, on behalf of you and myself, to thank the inventor of the blessing from the pharmacy- the Epidural. Bless you, Ye Great Inventor of Numbing Gold. Bless you.

Okay. So no one, hard as they tried, prepared us for labor, but, somehow we made it through. The pain. The tears. The fear.

Because no one can prepare you for the love. The love a mother feels when she sees that tiny life God has given her. It is a love that you never knew before. A sweetness. A mystery. A miracle.

Nothing will prepare you for the quiet moments in the soft light as you hold your tiny baby to your heart. Nothing prepares you for the days you spend watching her sleep or play. The laundry and the dishes pile up and amazingly, you just don't care.

No one can warn you about the dangers of the world. No one will explain the fear you will feel when she is so sick and you just don't know what to do. Nothing prepares you for the fever that just won't break, or the arm that did, for the drive to the emergency room in the middle of the night, or the long, tearful prayers for healing.

No one can prepare you for the days, the nights, the years ahead. Your baby girl will go to sleep tonight a tiny, fragile expression of God's Love. Before you know it, one morning she'll wake up a toddler, refusing to eat. One day she'll be on her way to Kindergarten, then First Grade, and so on.

And one day, our little girls will call us to say, "Mom, you're going to be a grandma!"

We'll try to give them advice and they'll ignore us. We'll try to prepare them for what is ahead. The pain. The fear. The love. We'll try to prepare them for Mommyhood, but we won't be able to.

That's Okay. That's what we'll do. We're Mothers.

Just remind me not to tell them how big they're getting.

:>)

This is what I'm talkin' 'bout!

This afternoon I was talking to Mama and she told me about these really cute dolls she found. They are called Faith and Friends and are available at Family Christian Book Stores.

Here is one of them-

Orange You Cute Doll

Is she cute or what?

The idea is to encourage our little girls to express their fashion creativity in a modest way, while expressing their faith and learning about The One who created them. The dolls come with a small Bible and a journal. There are some really cute accessories and one of the dolls even has her own "blog."

If any of you have these for your little girls, leave a comment. I'd love to hear about them. For more info about these cute dolls, go here.

Kudos to the inventors of these cute little toys!

Stop Serving My Coffee Dressed Like That

Updated to Add- I do love all of the "mocha makers" out there. I want to show them the love. I just don't want to see everything while I am trying to eat or have a coffee. As my mother would say,"There's a time and a place for all things." I am not against anyone having piercings and tatoos (except my own daughter). I just think some things should remain covered in certain places of business.
Thanks, Denise, for your caring comments. They were very thoughtful and compassionate. I appreciate the chance to clarify. :>)

Hang on a minute. I need to clear my throat for this one...

'Kay.

So I was at my local coffee house this morning purchasing my liquid doughnut. Most of the time I go through the drive thru because I am dressed like well, a bum. But not immodestly. This lovely, lovely woman named "Betty" is usually there each morning and I look forward to seeing her at the drive thru window. She is friendly and bubbly and over the age of 3o.

Love her.

This morning I ordered my usual Venti Mocha and drove around to wait for my delightful blend of hot cocoa and caffeine. (Genius!) As "Betty" cheerfully greeted me and took my money I was not-so-cheerfully greeted by the flash of a tattoo and undergarments of the Mocha Maker.

Picture this. I am sitting in the drive thru- eye level to this young woman's backside. Her shirt is hiked up in the back and I can see her tattoo just above the edge of her waistline. If I had not turned away so quickly, I also could have read the brand name of her undergarments. I came to be awakened by espresso and sugar, not the tacky backside of a twenty-something tart.

Express yourself somewhere else.

When the delightful Betty started to hand me my coffee, I politely said to her, "Please tell that girl to pull up her pants."

Betty turned and saw what I was talking about and then she quietly slipped away out of sight. I am guessing she said something to a manager. She returned to the window with a smile, handed me my mocha and with a wink she said,"It's taken care of. I agree."

There is actually a point to this rant, which is this. I am going to start complaining to management when I enter a store and employees are scantily clad with piercings in places that shouldn't be pierced, tattoos inappropriately displayed and undergarments showing. Hello! That's why they are called undergarments. They go under clothing. They aren't the actual clothing itself.

Most of the time I just roll my eyes or walk away, but after this morning I've decided to speak up. It is up to the customers who enter these establishments to at least try to make a difference. I will always try to make my complaints known in a polite manner instead of what I really would like to do.

Like reach in the drive thru window and jerk that girl's britches up so hard that she would have suffered from an atomic wedgie.

But I held back. I was nice. Frank and honest, but nice.

It's just a good thing it happened before I had my mocha.

Let's Kick It Up A Notch!

I was just reading BooMama and she needs some information on how to contact Kate Spade.

Yes, Kate Spade.

I can't help The BooMa, although I would love to oblige. To tell you the truth, BooMama is so popular that I would think we would all be asking her for Kate's cell number so we could text message her. Or maybe Boo is just holding out on us, seeing as how she is so humble and all. That's why we love her.

She's BooMama.

So, if any of you out there reading this happen to know or think you know someone who may know Kate Spade or hey, maybe you are actually Kate Spade (yeah, right) head on over to BooMama's blog and fill her in on all the low down. (And Kate, if you are reading this, "What's up, my homegirl?")

Big Mama's drug post has put me in some sort of tragic gangsta mode...

Anywho.

I have to tell y'all about my most recent celeb encounter. I say most recent because there have been several in my life. One was years ago when my husband and I were in Dulles airport and we saw Prince.

Well, it wasn't actually Prince then. He was The Artist formerly known as Prince. He was really not even an artist; he was a symbol.

So we saw what appeared to be the symbol formerly known as Prince escorted by two very large scary looking bodyguards. (Not Kevin Costner) And our conversation went something like this:

Hubs- "Look! That guy thinks he's The Artist formerly known as Prince."
Me- "It is The Artist formerly known as Prince."
Hubs- "Uh-Uhhh!"
Me- "Yes Huh!"
Hubs- "Nuh-Uhhhh!"
Interrupted by passenger walking by as The Artist leaves our sight, "Yes. It was him. He was on my flight. They let him get off the plane early."

Add the fact that the symbol formerly known as The Artist formerly known as Prince was close enough to hear our entire conversation and you can imagine why it has been one of the funniest moments in our marriage.

Back to my most recent encounter.

I was in Target one afternoon looking SUPER FLY with no make-up, a top knot for a hairdo and sweats. Let me be specific- I was wearing this shirt:

Then I saw him. Emeril Lagasse. Yes, m'am. I did. He pushed his little red cart right next to my little red cart, but I think my little red cart had more stuff in it. By the time I realized it was him, he had vanished into the housewares department and I was standing there like a deer in headlights with a bewildered look on my face.

"Yes. It's him," another shopper said. Apparently she could read my bewildered look.
"I think it is. I heard him talk. He has a distinct voice," I said to her as she pushed her little red cart.

I didn't want to approach him and be all paparazzi or anything. And, let's face it. I was in Target looking fine in my sweatpants and "the shirt." What was I going to do? Run up to him and say, "BAM! Can I have your autograph?" What would the man think?

Who is this deranged woman with that horrible top knot and exactly what kind of novel is she writing?

So I decided to lay low and just stare from afar. Oh, you know you would have stared, too! I went to the check-out lanes with my own little red cart and watched as he unloaded his little red cart. Then he did the most amazing thing! He bought paper towels! IN BULK!

Who knew?

I am in the know when it comes to the paper product purchasing of the rich and famous. It's an untapped tabloid market these days.

The brand? Wouldn't you like to know... I like to keep some things a secret. That's what makes me so mysterious... and weird.

BAM!

Overheard at my house

While in the baby department at Target-

(In a low whisper) "Mommy, I saw a Royal Potty."

"A what?"

"A Royal Potty. Come see."

"Why are you whispering it? Because you didn't want to say potty?"

"Yes. Come see!"

Indeed it was a portable potty seat for a little one. And it was quite royal.

The Fisher Price Royal Potty Stepstool




While petting Maggie, the big-fat-cat.

"Maggie, I'll be nice to you... even though you're squishing my guts out."

Apparently, we are not in good hands.

After watching an Allstate car insurance commercial...

Hubs- "What's the deal with Stan?"

Me- "What? Stan?"

Hubs- "Yeah. What's up with Stan?"

Me- "It's StanD. Not Stan!"

uncontrolled laughter

Hubs- "Ohhh. I thought it was some kind of catch phrase, "That's Allstate, Stan."

Me- "That's Allstate's StanD."

more laughter

Me- "You thought they were trying to get Stan to buy insurance. There is this one guy out there who refuses to buy Allstate and his name is Stan."

Hubs- "Yep. Now, that's focus advertising."

Welcome to the world, baby girl!

Praise God for tiny miracles.

Molly Amelia was born this morning, weighing 5 lbs., 5 oz.

She is a strong, healthy and beautiful baby girl.
Mom is doing well and Dad was present for the birth.

God is Good.

Thank you for your prayers, internets!

The Sadness Is No More

"It was now about the sixth hour,

and darkness came over the whole land until the ninth hour,

for the sun stopped shining.

And the curtain of the temple was torn in two.

Jesus called out with a loud voice, "Father, into your hands I commit my spirit."

When he had said this, he breathed his last." Luke 23:44-46 NIV

Sadness is not an emotion or a feeling. Sadness has breath and life. It stares you down with dark, piercing eyes. Sometimes it sneaks up on you in an unguarded moment. Sometimes you can see it in the distance, creeping slowly towards you until the hour comes when it strangles you in its dark, deathly hold.

Survival comes when you break free from the strangling, gasping for breath until the sadness runs away, hiding from the Light.

God is The Light.

Over 2000 years ago, this kind of sadness covered Mary, the mother of Jesus, and John, the beloved disciple. Sadness overwhelmed them as they stood helpless at the foot of The Cross watching their Christ slowly die. They were helpless to save Him, but He was not helpless to save them.

The darkness came and sadness hung thick in the air. Its weight crushed them. It was the kind of sadness that crying doesn't relieve. The tears come until one can cry no more and the heavy sadness makes it hard to breathe.

The Father and The Son were separated for the first time as my sins were laid upon Christ's beaten back. He held them on His weary shoulders, naked and humiliated, hanging in the dark sky on display for the fallen world. They mocked Him and spat on Him. All because of me. And you.

He had the power to save Himself but He used it to save the world.

From the sadness. From death. From eternal darkness.

And as He promised, the sadness left. The darkness was overcome with The Light. He rose from the dead in all glory so that we can be with Him one day in heaven.

Where there shall me no more tears, no more sadness, and no more darkness.

Just pure, saving, life-giving Light.

Please Pray

Looks like there will be a new kid in town today.


Without going into details about T's condition, I would just like to ask you to-

* Pray for her, the baby, and the family that is comforting them.
* Please pray that the medical staff will make the right decisions and make them in a timely manner.
* Pray that God will be glorified through it all.

Thank you for all of your prayers.

Great Photo

Head over to Southern Girl's Guide To Almost Anything.

You will love this photo!

Thank you!

His Singer over at His Unfinished Work has given me a lovely prize,

The Little Alien That Could AKA The Thinking Blogger Award.

Updated to add- A big thank you to Southern girl, too!

I didn't think I was a thinker. But I guess that makes me a thinker, or does it?

Hmmm...

Seriously, I do like a good discussion with hubs and friends about life, liberty and the pursuit of chocolate but I seldom write about those things.

Except the chocolate.

Thanks, His Singer, for thinking of me.

;>)

Ode To The Ones Left Behind

I've seen you many times.
All alone on the side of the road.
You are the forgotten one.
The right one.
The left one.
I just don't know.

I just keep on driving.
Wondering, "Where is your sole mate?"
I never stop to pick you up.
Or offer you a ride.
I just keep on driving.
A few times, I think I may have run over you.
(Sorry about the tread marks.)

Surely, you must be lonely there.
On the side of the road.
Or the highway.
Or the curb.
Caught between two lanes of traffic.
Trapped in this pothole called Life.

The mystery shuffles on.
And still, you wait.
Like all the others.
The flip flop.
The sneaker.
The boot.

Carry on, lonesome one.

Carry on.

I Knew Her When...

I was in Target today and guess what I happened to pass by.



This.

And I had to grab it (and pay for it, of course!) because I knew that Mrs. Dryer herself had a very touching story waiting for me to read between the pages.

I started to tell the cashier, "Yep. My friend wrote something in there... well she isn't really a friend, she is a blog friend and I have never met her, but we've emailed and I love her blog, and she is a sister in Christ, so yes... yes, she is my friend."


But the cashier looked like she was collecting two checks- One from Target and One from Social Security.


So I thought she would just say, "What, honey? What's a blog?"



Congrats, Shannon!!!

Viva Las Vegas and all that jazz.

Ahem.

No, really. I need to clear my throat. It's the Hack and Wheeze.

I'll spare you the rest of the details. Let's just say that I don't know why the Good Lord decided to make our bodies produce oddities that come from the nostrils and lungs.

And I hope you good folks already ate dinner.

Speaking of dinner, let me tell y'all more grossness from our house. I think I just invented a word.

At exactly midnight Sunday, the digital clock struck a digital twelve and my daughter hurled in her sleep all over our bed. All. Over. Our. Bed. With. Me. In. It.

My very southern comforter in all its magnolia blossom glory has a teeny tiny little label sewn into the seam where the magnolias meet with some lovely dogwood blossoms in a delightful display of southern comfort without the liquor. (I'm Baptist.)

Dry clean only.

I do have one ounce of mercy in me and I did not take the hurled upon not-so-comfortable comforter to the cleaners. I washed it in the washing machine like a good Mama does and it is now air drying in the bath tub as I pray that someone was just trying to play a joke on me when they placed such rigid laundering rules on my bedding.

Anywho.

Just as the lovely carriage turned back into a pumpkin, my daughter threw up and then she wanted the details.

"Mama, what did I just throw up?"

"Your dinner."

"But what?"

"Chicken Ya Ya (that's chicken nuggets to you rookies) and salad."

"And the ketchup on my chicken?"

"Yep. That, too."

"Now that my stomach is all empty, can I have something to eat?"

It's just a buffet of disgusting information at my house.

Now, where was I? Oh, yes. Jazz. Sanjaya, you must never, ever sing that song ever again because that song belongs to The English Patient in my head and you ain't no English patient. You don't even look ill. Please, sweet mercy, go to college and make your parents proud because I just can't take any more. Bless your heart. I know your Mama is so proud of you. I'm just sayin.

And did y'all know that Elvis is alive? I saw him today while house hunting. His full size poster was plastered on the wall of what could be used as a guest room or an office but is currently being used as a Sewing Room/Elvis Shrine.

As my Mama would say in a whisper, "To each his own. I didn't care for it."

Bless his heart.

Prayer Request Update

My sister-in-law is doing well. Had an ultrasound this morning. The baby's weight is looking good, heart rate good.

Will keep you updated. Thanks for all of the prayers!! It means a lot, Internets.

:>)

Need Prayer

Calling all Internets-

My sister-in-law really needs your prayers. Her water broke and she is 6 weeks early. Her husband is across the world right now serving his country. He was supposed to be home this week, in plenty of time for the birth.

My in-laws are driving down to be with her as I type. I am many hours away myself.

The baby's heart rate is fine. Please pray for T and the baby, and for Daddy-to-be who is far away right now.

Thank you,

Yep, I birthed her.

"Mommy, guess what I'm drawing."

Scribble on the Magna Doodle.

"A snake."

"Nope."

"Hmmmm..."

"DNA!"

"Uh-huh. That's a double helix."

"But whose DNA is it?"

Quotes

There's a Quotes Contest going on. The contest is closed, but you can still head over there and read some great quotes. I love me a good quote and I have searched for some of my favorites. I couldn't find just one.

I love to read things by Abraham Lincoln, Eleanor Roosevelt, Mark Twain and Erma Bombeck. I started to list one or two, but there were just too many to choose from.

So, here are a few of my own. They will surely leave no mark on your life or your floors.

Quotes by Melanie @ This Ain't New York

"I am tired of reading about successful women with briefcases, Botox, and million dollar bank accounts. Show me a woman who can get a two year old to eat dinner and remove ketchup stains from natural fibers. Now, she's my hero."

"If I had super powers, I would wave a wand over my house and make it look like the after pictures on all of those Extreme Makeover Home Shows, only prettier."

"If a mother were ever President, they would have to do away with the Oval Office.

There are no corners for Congress to go to Time Out."

"The only women in history who were remembered for being skinny were starving to death."